


Two Means Three and a Diamond Ring

by punk_rock_yuppie



Category: Saturday Night Live RPF
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Barebacking, Dirty Talk, Established Relationship, Impregnation Kink, M/M, PWP, porn without plot/plot what plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-24
Updated: 2019-07-24
Packaged: 2020-07-12 15:56:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,406
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19948900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/punk_rock_yuppie/pseuds/punk_rock_yuppie
Summary: “Seth Meyers,” he says, low, “Are you saying you want to knock me up?”





	Two Means Three and a Diamond Ring

**Author's Note:**

> I don't even entirely remember what it was that made me think "hadermeyers+impregnation kink" but here we are, a pile of filth. 
> 
> Big thanks to Hannah for beta'ing, as always! 
> 
> Enjoy!

“I’ve been thinking,” Seth starts, drawing shapes with his finger on Bill’s chest.

Bill doesn’t put his book down. “A dangerous pastime,” he teases. From the corner of his vision, he watches Seth roll his eyes. 

“Remember when…” Seth trails off but before Bill can prompt him for more, he’s carrying on in a rush. “When there was the bit, with Stefon being pregnant.” 

“It wasn’t that long ago, Seth. Course I remember. I’m not senile.”

“Debatable,” is Seth’s easy reply. There’s something in his tone that sounds far away, and that’s finally enough to get Bill to dogear the page in his book and set it aside. “I was thinking,” Seth starts again. 

“Seth,” Bill drawls. “Spit it out.” 

“Pregnant,” Seth says unhelpfully. 

“Uh huh.”

“You.”

“Me, pregnant?” Bill asks, lips twisting into a grin. 

“Not, like, actually.”

“Yes, Seth, because that’s not possible.”

Seth groans and instead of leaning playfully against Bill like he’s been doing, he faceplants into his pillow. “Forget it.”

“No, c’mon, now you’ve got me curious,” Bill says. He shimmies down to rest his head on his own pillow and stares at the side of Seth’s face. “What is it?” 

“I just like the idea of you...of _us_ making a family.” 

“Uh huh,” Bill says again, gentler this time. He lays a hand on Seth’s back and dances his fingers along the knobs of the other man’s spine. 

“Not so much the idea of you _being_ pregnant, or any of that... _nonsense_.” Seth’s voice is muffled and Bill leans closer to hear him better. “Why is this so hard?” Seth whines, miserable. 

Bill’s cheeks are burning now; he can feel the flush bleeding down his chest, especially as he leans in closer still. “Seth Meyers,” he says, low, “Are you saying you want to knock me up?” 

Seth’s whole body startles.

Bill’s tongue feels fat and heavy in his mouth, practically useless. He forces it to work anyway. “You want that? Get me knocked up?” 

“Bill, c’mon.” Seth lifts his head slightly and looks over at Bill. It’s gratifying to see his face just as pink and blotchy as Bill feels. 

Bill bites his bottom lip and stares back at Seth. “I’m not saying no, Seth.” 

Seth sits up a little more and tilts his head curiously at Bill. “Seriously?” 

“Gotta keep the romance alive somehow, right?” Bill laughs. He wants to cringe at cracking a joke now of all times but he knows that Seth knows—better than anyone—that it’s what Bill does when he’s nervous. 

Some of the nervousness fades when Seth finally rises onto his knees and shoves their blanket off the bed so he can seamlessly slot between Bill’s spread legs. They’re both naked from their romp the night before and it comes in handy now as Seth’s half-hard cock slides against Bill’s own. 

“C’mon,” Bill murmurs. “Tell me about it.”

Seth chokes on a gasp but manages to rasp out, “I want to be inside you.”

“That’s it?” Bill asks. A surge of confidence, of certainty, is filling him. “Just inside me?” He throws a hand out to the bedside table and digs around for their bottle of lube. Seth snatches it from him almost immediately and clumsily slicks up three fingers. 

“No, I want.” Seth stops and swallows. He falls silent as he slips two fingers into Bill slow and sure. “I want to come inside you, fill you up.” Seth says each word like it’s the best thing he’s gotten the chance to say and like it pains him. “Knock you up,” he hisses as he crooks his fingers. 

“So do it,” Bill retorts. “You made an honest man out of me, been waiting on you to give me a family.” 

Seth lets out a sound that’s caught somewhere between a laugh and a moan. “Yeah? You want it?” 

Bill nods as his eyes slip shut. It’s not something he’s ever considered before—he’s pretty sure it’s not even something Seth has ever really considered before. This thing between them is haphazard and clumsily pieced together. There’s a high likelihood it’ll turn distinctly _not sexy_ at a moment’s notice, but for now...it’s actually pretty hot. 

“Fuck, Bill,” Seth groans, right in Bill’s ear. He’s three fingers deep in Bill’s ass now and Bill is suddenly impatient.

“C’mon, Seth, let’s make a baby.” A giggle, hysterical, spills from his lips and Seth smothers it with a kiss. It turns messy and sharp, Seth’s teeth sinking into Bill’s bottom lip, as his fingers are replaced with his cock. Bill sucks in a sharp, surprised breath just as he always does every time Seth sinks inside him, but still has the wherewithal to gasp out, “Fuck me, do it.” 

Seth’s hips jerk forward and he slams home. Bill throws his head back in response, a moan tearing from his throat. He’s so caught up in the feeling of Seth inside him to the hilt, he almost misses the nonsensical filth spilling from Seth’s lips. 

“So tight, Bill, so good.” A sloppy kiss against Bill’s cheek, then teeth nipping at his ear. “Gonna fill you up, keep fucking you until come is leaking out of you. Gonna shove it back inside with my fingers to make sure you end up pregnant.”

“Christ, Seth,” Bill gasps out. His nails rake down Seth’s back as heat rockets up his spine. It’s absolutely ridiculous but that doesn’t stop Bill’s cock from twitching eagerly. 

“Gonna keep going till you’re begging me to stop, and then I’ll just turn you over and stay inside you, filling you up.” 

Bill drags his hands down Seth’s back to clutch at his ass and haul him impossibly closer. “Yeah, yeah, yeah,” he hisses. 

Seth groans as Bill’s fingers tease along his crack and his thrusts go off-kilter and jerky. “Fuck, Bill, gonna come.” 

Bill reluctantly detaches a hand from Seth’s ass to wrap it around his own cock instead. He doesn’t even have a chance to warn Seth, or to urge him on; just wrapping his fingers around his dick is enough to have him coming, since it’s coupled with Seth’s words echoing in his head and his cock splitting him open hard enough Bill thinks he can feel it in his throat. 

Bill arches his back as come spurts up across his chest. It shoots so high it even splatters across his collarbone and almost immediately, Seth bends to lap at the streaks of white. 

“Seth,” Bill whines, gripping a handful of Seth’s ass. “Come inside me, let’s make a baby.”

Another half-moan, half-laugh bursts from Seth’s mouth as he does just that. His thrusts slow to an awkward not-quite rhythm as his cock pulses deep inside Bill, doing exactly what he promised: filling him up.

For a moment, Bill has the thrilling thought of _we’re starting a family_ as Seth grunts in his ear. 

Seth collapses on top of him a moment later and Bill winds his arms around Seth’s back. He strokes along Seth’s back until he raises his head to grin lazily at Bill. “Thanks for that,” he says quietly before kissing Bill gently on the lips. 

“It was better than anticipated,” Bill admits. “Maybe only like, a quarter as weird as I expected.” 

Seth ducks his blushing face and kisses at Bill’s neck. “I’ll grab a washcloth.” Another kiss to the still come-sticky dip of Bills collarbone. 

Bill stops him with a hand against the nape of his neck and a leg hitched over his hip. “Thought you said you were gonna keep going until we were sure there’s a bun in the oven?”

Seth snorts and kisses Bill again. “Your faith in my ability to get an erection so quickly is appreciated, but unfounded.” Seth pulls out and even though he’s still moving like he’s going to get off the bed, Bill doesn’t miss how Seth’s gaze lingers on his hole. 

“You’ve done it before. Besides, you’ve got fingers, don’t you?” 

Seth freezes and the gaze he levels at Bill is heavy. “Yeah?”

Bill relaxes against the covers and spreads his legs. He’s already feeling oversensitive and they’re both far too old for this kind of behavior, but his blood lights up like a firework when Seth brushes hesitant fingers over Bill’s hole.

“Yeah,” Bill finally remembers to say. “Yeah, c’mon, we gotta keep trying.” 

Seth laughs as he kisses Bill again. “Can’t argue with that.” 


End file.
